Closer to Dying

That first midnight
that front carseat
that first time we said "I love you"
and I also said "You DO mean get married and everything. . .?"
and he answered "yes"
and he became my you

that's when I was rescued
that's when I was safe
that's when I thought "It's wonderful; it's settled"
and it was
for a very long while.

Maybe dying is getting settled.
The kind of settled like 11:00 P.M.
the kind of settled like someone putting a firm hand on your arm
and guiding you across the street
in a fatherly or European way.

Or maybe dying is un-settled again.
Flung to the slime.
No more cars, no more midnight.
You're you-less, yes-less
embedded in pure German-E-three
a different E-three for each of us
but all of them thick.
Space exists, is three-dimensional, and canNOT be filled.
There is no such thing as empty.
There is no such thing as filled.

2002 Marion Cohen.  All rights reserved. 



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